Beyond Sunday

Giving Today: Trading Grasping for Gratitude 

• King of Kings Church

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What if the biggest blind spot in our lives isn’t what we spend, but what we love? We gathered an all-women panel to talk about how greed hides in everyday choices, why gratitude is more than a mood, and how small, consistent acts of generosity retrain the heart. From funny driving confessions to sobering stories about entitlement, we trace the subtle ways culture normalizes greed—and how Scripture cuts through the fog.


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SPEAKER_01:

Welcome to Beyond Sunday, the King of Kings podcast, where we dive a little bit deeper into our message series and see what we're taking Beyond Sunday. It is ladies' day today. Our panel is all women. Go ahead and introduce yourselves, ladies.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm Kate Solberg, and I'm the Associate Campus Director of our Northwest Campus. Woohoo!

SPEAKER_00:

And I'm Julie Easley. I'm the executive director here at King of Kings.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm Dina Newsome here with you every week. Um, you know, for our starting question today, one of the things that Zach talked about at the very beginning of this week's message was asking people if they thought they were a good driver. And then he gave a quote that insurance companies feel that women are safer drivers than men. My question for you is are you a good driver or not a good driver?

SPEAKER_00:

Well, be honest. I'm a I'm a fast driver. I've probably gotten eight tickets in my life. Oh, Julie. Less, less as I've gotten older. And the guys always make fun of me here at work because I do have a little bit of a pulling into the parking space problem. Um, it's I've gotten mean notes. I got a mean note on my car from someone, yes, who who wrote learn how to drive and stuck it on my windshield. So I don't know. I but I haven't been in many accidents, so I've maybe one. I guess I'm I'm probably one of those like middle of the road types. Not awesome, but not horrible.

SPEAKER_02:

I definitely have gotten slower as I get older. I do not drive quickly. I am always thinking a kid's gonna dart in front of me. So I've always lived in neighborhoods with little kids, which makes me super paranoid. Yeah. And then when you teach your kids how to drive, the worst. That is a whole nother level. So both of my kids would tell you, like, she drives slow. So I'm like, I don't like to be in a hurry. So I think when you drive slower, you are a better driver. I don't drive under the speed limit, but there have been times where people have passed me and looked at me like, pick it up, lady. Which to them, I say, I am in the right lane. So go around me if necessary. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

It's good. How about you? I'm a grandma driver, but I'm a grandma. So, you know, it works, it works out. I used to be when I was younger, I was a horrible driver. Like I would do everything while driving. I can, when I was in high school, I would put my makeup on in the car while I was driving to school. I can't even imagine the number of accidents that God wanted me to be here today because I must have narrowly avoided many. And I was an impatient where you'd pull up really fast, you know, and try to pass people, but then you'd end up at the stoplight right next to the same people that were going slow. I always love to look over at them and be like, here we both are. Which I finally came to the realization that doing that doesn't get you there any faster. And now I am a very, I'm a pretty slow driver. If I'm not in the right lane and we're coming up on the turn, I won't fight to get over. I'll circle around, we'll take the scenic route, we'll what's the hurry? It drives my kids nuts. I need to.

SPEAKER_00:

I need to take lessons from my son once said to me, if I could give you any gift, it would be that everyone drives exactly the way you want them to on the road.

SPEAKER_02:

That's hilarious.

SPEAKER_00:

It's also convicting.

SPEAKER_02:

My my son loves to like be ready to honk the instant it turns greedy. Oh, just to annoy people. And I'm like, oh wow. You might take off the wrong person one day.

SPEAKER_01:

All right. Well, switching from driving to generosity, we just finished week six of the giving challenge. This has been a fabulous six weeks. And this week we were talking about trading grasping for gratitude. And Pastor Zach Sender took us through the final week of this. What are you guys taking beyond Sunday from this week?

SPEAKER_00:

I was thinking about things that I can be repentant for before the Lord. And it's true. I don't think I've ever prayed about my greed. So when he was saying that, like no one confesses. I'm like, I don't know if I've confessed that to the Lord very much at all. So that was sobering. And just being just more aware of things that I assume would be my right to have or to own, or what would make a great life for me that I'm somehow owed.

SPEAKER_02:

Definitely. I thought about that a lot. There was a quote he said, Do you have money or does money have you? And I thought that was a wise question to ponder. So that was one little piece I took.

SPEAKER_01:

I really enjoyed the uh loincloth story that he told at the start, how this man created this whole town and systems and crops and everything. And when the master came back, he said, Well, it was the only way I could keep my loincloth clean. Yes. And I think, how often do I do that? Do I create this whole set of something to do a very small thing that maybe is just very humbling or very work on myself instead of just owning it and doing it?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, it's good.

SPEAKER_01:

One of the things that Zach um started out with was he thinks that the great American blind spot is greed. Do you agree, or what are your thoughts on that?

SPEAKER_00:

I do think it's just like the water that we swim in is just so consumeristic and you get down that road a little ways and it can just suck you in like a vortex. I remember when we moved into our new house, we had never in our married life, we've been married 30 years, I'd never had like a like a bedroom set, you know, with like a headboard or matching side tables. And I remember saying to Dale, I'm a full grown-up now, and I'm getting one of these because I deserve it after all this time. And I, you know what? It's not really true. I and I did get it. So true confessions, I do now have a bedroom set. But I it was like I was owed it because I had lived a certain amount of time, and it's just what grown-ups do. Well, I'm sure there are plenty of grown-ups all over the world who don't have a matching bedroom set, but I just felt so entitled to it.

SPEAKER_02:

Agree. Yeah, in America, you're I feel like you're gonna be greedy unless you fight against it. Like it is just our culture, it's social media, it's the TV and commercials we it's just prevalent. Yeah. And it's the natural way to go. And I live in the uncomfortable position of having two children at opposite ends of the spectrum. So I I won't name names, but one child wants multiple new things daily, and it's a necessity while the other child could easily be wearing clothing that that child outgrew years ago.

SPEAKER_00:

So interesting.

SPEAKER_02:

That I need to point out like those might need to be retired or burned.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So I'm like, man, how do you raise two children exactly the same? Like, this is the product.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, it's interesting.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. I started thinking about this and felt very convicted in my parenting. I don't, I mean, yes, I was greedy. Yes, I wanted things for myself, like as we were, you know, getting our family and our family was growing and bought a house and stuff. But I think of the things that I thought my kids had to have. I mean, like at one point, I had three children in my house at the same time. And all three of them had, well, two of them had a computer in their room. One of them had like a small handheld game system. They all had TVs in their rooms. Like, and I just think, how unnecessary is that? Because we also had TVs and computers elsewhere in the house. Now, were they brand new, the fanciest? You know what I mean? Like, no. But I just thought that when Zach was talking about the average child has 240-some toys or something. I was like, oh no. And I catch myself thinking about that for my grandkids. Yes. Oh, well, they just really want this thing. Oh, Nana could buy that for them.

unknown:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

And my daughter is somewhat of a minimalist. Like, she wants quality things, but she does not want a plethora of things. And so she will be like, they don't need any more toys. Yeah. Like they just stop. They don't.

SPEAKER_00:

Rain it in, grandma.

SPEAKER_01:

All right. So one of the Bible references that Zach turned to was Haggai, which I have to admit, I don't remember any time I've referenced Haggai in my adult ministry life, to be honest. But it was kind of about God chastising this group of people who were supposed to be working on the Lord's house and kind of took a break in the middle. And the one little part of the verse I liked was where God says, give careful thought to your ways. And I thought, what a nice way of God just saying, check yourself. Hey there. Um, kind of calling them out. How did this verse or this story resonate with you? Do you want to read it, Kate? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

It starts at verse three, and it just says, The Lord sent his message through the prophet Haggai. Why are you living in luxurious houses while my house lies in ruins? This is what the Lord of Heaven's army says. Look at what's happening to you. You have planted much, but harvest little. You eat, but are not satisfied. You drink, but are still thirsty. You put on clothes, but cannot keep warm. Your wages disappear as though you were putting them in pockets filled with holes. That's really good. Yeah. And that's, you know, that's what I think about. Like my one child who loves things, that is not gonna satisfy her. I pray that she realizes that sooner than later. You know, and it is a constant chase of the next thing, the next thing, you know, and it's just it, it just reflects that exact scripture. You ate, you're not satisfied. You drank, you're still thirsty. It's it's not fulfilling, it's not lasting, and it's not what God intended for us.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. Just thinking about that whole outfitting your hotel room. I mean, that I've thought about that this whole series. That was a really good record. I am outfitting my hotel room for my two-day stay. This is crazy. And yeah, like you said, ultimately not satisfying. I mean, when my husband and I first started out in Married Life, he was a student and we had like zip o money, like none, beans and rice, rice and beans, like even when the kids were little. And our situation is different now. But I have to say, and this this is kind of on the positive side of things. I was just as, I mean, truly, I was really happy back then with so little. It's not the material things that satisfy. It's it's the Lord, it's the joy that you take in your family, it's in the those, you know, lasting things, those treasures in heaven that you're gathering as opposed to the stuff on earth that Maws and Rust consume.

SPEAKER_01:

When uh my husband and I first lived together, we had one pot. And so when we wanted to cook, we would like cook the pasta and then dump it out, and then we could cook the veggies and dump it out. And then if we were making something else, just one pot. But I was happy then too. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. I now I have pots that I don't ever use. Right. Um, okay, so uh one of the the things that Zach talked about was he got to have this guest on his podcast once, and his name was Jamar Tisby, and he gave a quote from him called The Root Determines the Fruit. Now, this was in reference to talking about racism, and Jamar was talking about how greed is really the root of racism, you know, and a lot of social issues. But that quote, the root determines the fruit. How do you see this play out today in our lives or when you see greed unchecked?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I just think about really at the root of so much sin is just idolatry. Taking the allegiance that you should have to God and placing it on other things. And you know, greed is it's easy to see idolatry happening. But I think that's just a very powerful, bad route that creates tons of negative fruit. Um, just saying, God, I'm gonna, I'm gonna take you off the throne of my life and I'm putting something else on there. And a lot of times it can be my financial security or how I look to other people, um, or just wanting to be comfortable. I'm constantly needing to evaluate what's on the throne of my life right now. And boy, it's real easy to just kind of scooch God off and and something else will get on there. Um, it's kind of a daily thing. You have to make sure, kind of check, check yourself.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. I don't think you're ever gonna develop biblical traits and qualities without discipline. And like, you know, going back and and examining Zach said, um, you know, unchecked greed and just taking time to examine, give careful thought to your ways, which you already mentioned, Dina, but basically the idea of a budget, like knowing where your money's going. And that no one naturally budgets. It just doesn't happen, you know. It doesn't happen unless you're like, oh, I'm gonna sit down and do it. You know, and there's tons of apps that whatever can track your spending and stuff, but still you have to look at it, you have to put the numbers and you have to like analyze, like, oh my gosh, for me, I I don't want to cook, you know? I don't want to plan a menu and ingredients, and it's and I can give so quickly any reason why we're getting food takeout tonight, you know? But that is so expensive compared to planning a menu, buying the ingredients. And so for me, that's my conviction. When I look at my budget and I actually track how much money I spend on meals out or pickup, takeout fast food, whatever, that's convicting to me. So yeah, it's not gonna happen naturally. You have to set it as a priority. You have to set aside time, you have to do it, and then you have to revisit it.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And then be willing to change. Like if you look at your budget and you're like, oh, look at how much we spend on eating out, but then don't do anything about it to change it. You have to eat the next day still. You gotta have a plan. That's what I struggle with the most is the change. Like I can look at it and be like, oh yeah, I'm gonna do better next month or next year or whatever it is. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, but yeah, having that discipline to actually put it in there. Oof dah. Yeah. Um, I thought of a person, a family member of mine who is always wanting the next shiny thing when they were talking about this, the root, the fruit. And um, he just always wants the newest, the best when something new comes out, you know, whether it's a car, a computer, a TV, any kind of new gadget. I just think of a time where my whole family was at Disney. Y'all know I love Disney, and this person knew we were at Disney and was calling multiple members of my family while we're at the park, not like in the evening or anything, asking opinions on a new car that they were buying. And I just thought, where is the priority in this? Like, you know where we are, but it's so important to you to talk about and select this new car today, at this moment, and wanting to talk about that with other people, that you're not even giving space to, you know, like you know where we are.

unknown:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Talk to us later, or when we get back into town or you know what I mean? And I just thought that comes from an uh almost like an emptiness, I feel like, that that we're we try to fill with stuff. Yep. That's where the greed comes from instead of filling it with God.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_01:

Which the one of the questions that Zach asked that I really liked that I want to ask you is how do we stumble in serving our stuff more than serving our savior? How does that convict you?

SPEAKER_02:

I had a great example. Um, my dad, he's such an interesting man. Um, but my parents, they had a house fire. I don't baby, Ben was a baby, so it was about 20 years ago. Um, and so they had to move into an apartment temporarily while their house was being repaired. And my dad was like, one bedroom apartments are amazing. Like he was like, you can't fit any extra things in it. Yes. He's like, There's only like two rooms to be in charge. Like my dad, the older he gets, he's never been a stuff guy, but he's been retired for like two weeks. And my mom's like, if he goes through the rooms one more time, we're gonna do that. But he loves to get rid of stuff. He reuse, I mean, he's so low maintenance, like thrifty, like like not even thrifty, like just keep using the same things over and over and over. And you know, we never had a fancy car. And it's just it, I love that model. And and through that, I watched him like he just never wanted to have debt, never, you know. And I remember when you first go to college, I don't know if you guys remember, but they have like tables set up where it was like free t-shirt if you sign up for a credit card. Oh, yeah. All the all of us dumb college students are like free money, which that is not what it is. But, you know, for the first time, you can kind of make financial decisions without your parents knowing. And some of my friends got into big credit trouble because it's so easy, you know. But I'm thankful for that lesson that I watched in him. Like, you are to aggressively pay off debt because that's where there's freedom. Because when you have debt, debt is heavy, it's a burden. You know, you have your generosity is less when you're a slave to that. And so I'm thankful for watching him, even though it was annoying sometimes. I'm like, eh, it's fine, you know, everyone has, you know, it's fine, dad. And so I appreciate that lesson from him. And I've benefited from it. Right.

SPEAKER_00:

So I think like the amount of stuff, your amount of stuff and your amount of time are inversely proportional to each other. You got more stuff, you're gonna have less time because all that stuff needs to be managed and maintained and cared for and kept up and kept clean and put somewhere and stored somewhere. And insured. Yes. And it's just that all of that takes time. Right. And so just to be aware, right? The more stuff you add, the less time you'll have. So just I've got to keep that in mind as well. Keeping it simple.

SPEAKER_01:

I am a huge fan of a good purge. Like I love spring cleaning, fall cleaning. I don't do it enough in my own house and I collect stuff. But then like it gets to the point where, oh my gosh, I can't take it anymore and I need to purge. And I love that feeling. But what I like better is not just like getting rid of it, but if you can find somebody that needs those things or you find a better home for them. Like last week, one of the things that happened here at King of Kings, right now, I am kind of in the process of spearheading a cleaning and overhaul of a warehouse storage that we have. This building we're blessed with here at Millard is huge. And we have this great storage space in the back, but it's kind of been neglected. And we, even as a church, have stuff that sits back there that maybe we don't utilize. And so I've kind of been going through a lot of this, talking with each department. And one of the things that we found were boxes and boxes of bags, paper grocery bags and recyclable grocery bags, which I think came out of some projects that the church did during COVID, I believe. Some food pantries and things like this, which was all good things. But now those bags have been sitting back in the warehouse unused. I don't even know who all knows they're back there, you know? So we're cleaning out back there and we came across them. And I'm like, okay, well, how can we use this? And at the same time, we're talking about all the food insecurity with the government shutdown that's happening. And so we donated those bags to Together Inc., one of the local food pantries that we partner with sometime. There was 2,500 paper bags and like 600 reusable grocery bags that we were able to give to them. I don't know where their bags normally came from, but that's something that we had sitting unused that we're able to be generous with that is gonna benefit the people at the food bank and the people who utilize the food bank, that they don't have to bring their own bags or have their own bags, or the pantry doesn't have to buy them, at least for a little bit. And that's like a double whammy to me when you get it purge something, but you get it to give it to somebody who needs it. Yep.

SPEAKER_00:

So good.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. Okay, Pastor Zach talked about three steps to a better way regarding greed. And I just want to know your thoughts on each one of these. Step one was repentance, confessing and admitting, and then turning. Step two was gratitude. What are you really grateful for? And step three was give today. How did those hit you?

SPEAKER_00:

Uh repentance, I better start doing that. That's the first one. Uh, gratitude. I keep a journal where I just write down a few things that happened every day. So it's not like a deep, like, oh, here's how I feel about it. It's mostly just recording, like, here's what happened today. But at the top, this year, I wanted to think about and be more grateful this year. And so I write at the top one thing that I'm truly grateful for. And I have to say, I'm not saying things like, my car or my stuff. It's usually people or precious things that happened um during the day. And so that's kind of revealing in itself. And then, you know, what can you give today? I just think about, you know, the time or effort that I'm putting towards stuff. How could I set that down and turn my attention towards people, the people that Jesus loves and invest in that?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. I I also loved just gave us that tiny bit of time to repent to go before the Lord. Because again, unless you're in the routine, we don't do it enough. And then to just hear those words of absolution from Zach, you know, like that's a gift in itself. Just to hear that you have been forgiven. Um and I've I feel like gratitude has gotten me through many of hard seasons. And it's just something I've loved, you know, hopefully passing on to my kids. And when I was a teacher, you know, we took time a lot to talk about what we're thankful for and to write about what we're thankful for. Cause I do believe it changes your brain chemistry and and in the chemistry of your body, even. I love the fact that you cannot, you know, your brain cannot house anxiety and gratitude at the same time. And so many people struggle with anxiety, and I've struggled with anxiety. But when you shift that to gratitude and just, I think gratitude and and praising God, like I don't know if there's two better things. You know, when you're praising God and thinking of who he is, a lot of times it goes into thanking him for what he's done, who he is, what he's given us. Those two things, boy, that's a recipe for just a sense of calm and purpose. And yeah, it's a good, good habit to be in.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, the gratitude is what really hit me. And Zach actually used an example of something I do on social media, thanks, Vember. And I think that we have this idea that gratitude is always happy. And I don't think that's true. We can be grateful for hard times and we can be grateful for hurtful memories that we learned from or things that turned us closer to God. Like the Sunday when this message was given was November 9th, which was my wedding anniversary for the 20 some years that I was married. I'm now divorced. But I am thankful. That was my thanks Vember day nine. Um, I'm thankful for the years that I was married. I'm thankful for who I learned to be in that. I'm thankful for the children and grandchildren that came out of that. I'm thankful for who I learned I was in my divorce and through counseling and all of the hard parts of that too. On this side of it, I am so grateful for that. And I am grateful that God was there with me every step of the way. And I look back now sometimes and I think, would I change that? And there's pieces of who I am that I don't think I would be had I not gone through that experience. And I don't know that I would change it. You know what I mean? There's that's a a harder choice sometimes to think about. Like that led me to where I am today. And I don't know that I'd take it away, even if it was hard. And I think we forget to be grateful for those opportunities too. Um, and that's something I I try to focus on in my gratitude. I'm grateful for the happy things and the easy things and the good things, but I'm also grateful for those shaping moments that God gives us. That's good. All right. What are your final takeaways from either this week's message or this whole series, this giving challenge? Gosh, it's been six weeks already. I know. It's gone really quickly. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Having the discussion that we have had right now, just think about like um when you're on, let's say that you're on the ocean and you're laying on a raft, you're gonna drift unless you sit up and keep like paddling to keep yourself in the same spot. I think it's so easy for us to drift into just greed and and self-centeredness. And what are the um disciplines that we're putting into our lives? Disciplines of gratitude, disciplines of really looking at where our money is going, disciplines of repentance. Those are like our ways of paddling on the raft to keep us kind of centered where God wants us. And so I'm just reminding myself like, just don't drift, because that's when you get into trouble. My heart is not going to naturally drift towards being others-centered or very generous. It's just not. I mean, scripture talks about our hearts and what our inclinations are. So just asking Jesus, help me to paddle so I can stay like focused on you and and your kingdom.

SPEAKER_02:

Agree. I loved also the 2nd Corinthians passage that Zach referenced, how God gives everything to me that I need. And it was at a great cost. He became poor. You know, he left the throne to be a human and to live humbly as a servant for my benefit. And so in return, I want to have him as my priority.

SPEAKER_01:

So that's good. So one of the things Zach said this week that stuck with me was greed is a heart issue. I tend to think of it as a head issue. He says greed is a heart issue. And then one of the things he has said throughout the whole message was that generosity reflects the heart of Jesus. And so I thought, okay, well, here this week, where I want to fight greed being a heart issue, I want my heart to be like Jesus. And generosity, which was the theme throughout these weeks, reflects the heart of Jesus with how generous he was coming here and dying for us and in all that he gives us and takes care of us. And that really struck me. I was like, okay, I gotta keep my heart to be more like Jesus. And that hopefully will help me be more generous and more giving. Yep. Thank you, ladies, so much for being here. We jump into a new sermon series starting next week, and we'll Be back here on Beyond Sunday. Until then, let's keep living our faith, Beyond Sunday.

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